I Am a Wounded Warrior

Heal The Wound But Leave The Scar

Tonight I had a talk on the phone with one of my oldest friends. This dear friend has been through a tremendous amount of trials in her life...ones that if I'd had to endure I'm not sure I could have handled it. I've dealt with my own share of trials....lost pregnancies, abandonment, rejection, divorce, rape, sexual abuse, spousal abuse (verbal, physical, mental, financial), homelessness, drug addiction....Wow, once I list them I see just how much I have personally gone through!

I'm an Overcomer!

And so is EVERYONE who puts their faith in Christ. What truly saddens me about my dear friend that I spoke to tonight is that she has lost her faith after all that she has been through. There were times when I doubted my faith along the way....times that I ran as far from God as I could because I didn't think He was there for me with everything I'd faced. But I was WRONG!

When the time came that I finally hit rock bottom (which I did a FEW times before surrendering), I noticed that the ONLY person who was there to pick me up and heal all that was broken in me. I find now, that after fully surrendering to Him, I can talk about my experiences without feeling the pain and anger about them that I once felt. I can talk about how God has healed my soul, and made me whole again. My life is still FAR from perfect, but it is so much better since I've learned to give it all to Him every day. 

This dear friend of mine has lost her faith in God, others and herself because of the difficult things that she's gone through. She turned to God several times, and has given up on organized religion, because of people who have called themselves Christians and have fallen short of the mark. My dear friend expected the leaders of the churches she attended to give her the things that she needed, and when they proved to be human, as indeed they are, she gave up on God. 

WE WILL NEVER FIND PERFECTION IN ANY HUMAN, REGARDLESS OF WHAT CHURCH THEY ATTEND, LEADER...APOSTLE....PROPHET... EVERY HUMAN WILL FALL SHORT OF THE MARK OF PERFECTION WE PUT ON THEM.

There has always been only ONE perfect person to ever walk this earth, and He CAN give you the strength, healing and support you will always need. His name is Jesus!

The third musketeer in our group of friends....my girlfriend, our dear friend, and I....has been missing for several years and is also tormented by the horrific things he experienced in life. After enduring several traumas he turned to drugs, and he has never been the same. Sadly, I feel partly to blame for this dear friend's addiction, because he and I used heavily together back in the day, but I chose to enter recovery and change my life. He chose to remain in his addiction and refused to give up his pain to the only one who can truly heal our hearts. He also chose to rebel against Jesus and claim that He didn't care about him or He wouldn't have allowed him to go through all that he has. 

This is the greatest lie that the enemy can get us to believe. I have chosen to have a different philosophy in life. I have chosen to turn to the one who rescued me and give Him all my imperfections, and all my pain. The Word of God says in James 1:2-5...I prefer the Amplified translation, as it puts it into such great context...

    "Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations. Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience.But let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be [people] perfectly and fully developed [with no defects], lacking in nothing."  

I am truly grateful that I've been changed from the inside out by His great love. For a long time I was just as bitter and angry as my friends. It makes me sad to see people resort to a life of sadness and misery, when all they have to do is surrender and allow Him to take away their pain. I hope that anyone who is suffering from the intense pain of life's scars will be able to find peace as I have someday. I'm grateful now that Jesus has healed the wounds of my past, but left the scars behind so I will never forget. In closing I'd like to share this song with you, and I hope it touches your heart as it has mine. 

I pray for you every day, my friends. May God's peace be given to you through the one and only healer of all wounds....Jesus Christ!

Brother Jesse Duplantis Visits Faith Christian Family Church, First Service 1/27/2013

Once a year for about the past decade Reverend Jesse Duplantis from New Orleans, Louisiana has visited my church, Faith Christian Family Church in Clovis, New Mexico. Today I personally had my second chance to see this wonderful man of God speak. I will post two blog posts on this today, summarizing his sermons, because I believe it is worthy of repeating and sharing with others.

Jesse's first sermon today was about WHY ISN'T MY GIVING WORKING? The Four Types of Giving. All my life I have struggled with the Law of Tithing. I've always had questions about the tithe, first fruits and all the other ways of giving I've read about in the Scriptures. Today, all of those questions were answered and it all made sense to me. Starting next payday I plan to correct my ways of giving to line up with these biblical principles.

The Four Ways of Giving are:
1. The Tithe - Your 10% that which belongs to the Lord
2. First Fruits - Our first increase of the year
3. Alms - Compassionate giving
4. Seed - Investing and watching the Lord return your investment 30/60/100-fold

Number One - The Tithe
The Law of Tithing is outlined in Malachi 3:8-12. It is the only area where God ASKS us to put HIM to the test. He promises us that if we give 10% of our income to him faithfully, then he will open the windows of Heaven and pour out blessings so great to us that we have not room enough to receive it. He guarantees that HE will rebuke the devourer for OUR sake, but if we do not tithe he cannot rebuke Satan on our behalf. Those of us who do not pay tithing the way that we are commanded to cannot wonder why we can't make ends meet. (I am definitely included in this category of people. Sadly, I often make the excuse that I cannot afford to pay tithing, since my medical bills are so expensive out-of-pocket.) But all we need to do is OBEY, and watch God work miracles on our behalf. The blessing is already there. Are we motivated enough to OBEY Him so that He can keep his promise to us? God ALWAYS keeps His promises. The only reason WE are not able to claim those promises is because we don't keep the law that He has asked of us.  Many people say, "You don't have to pay your 10% to the Church, you can use that 10% to donate to another worthy cause and it is still considered a tithe." WRONG. Many people make this mistake and then wonder why the windows of Heaven are not open to them. This type of giving is motivated by OBEDIENCE. God commanded us to give our tithe to the Church, so that the Church can further its ministries, and then we in turn will be blessed with food in our storehouses, and protection from times of recession and depression.

Number Two - First Fruits
The Scriptures says in Proverbs 3:9-10 to "Honor the Lord with thy substance, and with the first fruits of all of thine increase, so shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and thy presses burst forth with new wine." The way Brother Jesse explained the first fruits giving is that it is done once a year, with our first increase of the year. Back when the Scriptures were written, the economy was mainly agricultural, and people measured their first increase by the first fruits of their harvesting season. Therefore, they would take those first fruits and donate them to the Church or the Priest, and then the remainder of the harvest was theirs to do with as they would. This type of giving is motivated by GENEROSITY. It is a way of HONORING what the Lord has given to us. He promises us that our barns will be full and our vats will overflow with new wine, which, put plainly means that we will always have MORE than enough food in our storehouses. We will never go hungry. I have never done a first fruits offering, as I have never truly understood this. However, I am anticipating a raise in the near future, and I plan to give the first fruits of my increase (a whole $17.50) to the Church, and give it to an area of ministry. I will probably donate it to Celebrate Recovery, since that is an area of ministry I am actively involved in, or maybe Missions. Someday I hope to go on a humanitarian mission with my husband, to Latin America, where I can bless the lives of less fortunate people in cultures that I have a passion for.

Number Three - Alms
"Alms for the poor!" - We all know that saying. This is exactly what type of giving this is. This type of giving is motivated by COMPASSION. It is giving to the less fortunate, and in doing so, giving anonymously. In the Word it says, "Let not thy left hand know what thy right hand is doing". This type of giving is to BLESS the lives of others, and to do so without bragging. We should never brag about how much or to whom this type of giving is done. This is to preserve the dignity of those we give to, and just to show that we care about others, not for our own gain. The Lord promises us that the gifts we give in alms giving will be repaid back to us dollar for dollar, that we shall not PROFIT from this type of giving, but that how much we give to others, as long as we do it humbly, will come back to us in kind. This is the only type of giving that does not promise an increase, but equal favor for the favor we show to others.

Number Four - Seed
When we plant a seed, we wait for the crop to grow and reap ABUNDANCE in the harvest. This is exactly how Brother Jesse explained this type of giving. This type of giving is motivated by FAITH & REWARD. What this means is that when we plant a seed in fertile soil (or INVEST in a good and worthy cause), we will receive back 30, 60 or 100-fold what we sow, depending on our faith, and how much we believe in that reward. This is the most abundant blessing we receive back to us, and it blesses not only ourselves but future generations. Those who do not sow seed will not reap the abundance that is promised. So donate to a worthy ministry or invest in a worthy investment and watch your seed grow and enjoy the abundance that comes back to you according to your faith.

This month's Covenant Magazine, a monthly publication by Jesse Duplantis Ministries, outlines in detail the first two types of giving, and next month's edition will detail the last two. This was a lot of typing for this post, so I will blog about what he preached during our second service today another time. It was just as powerful and wonderful. If you don't want to wait for me to post about it though, just read the title article in this month's Covenant Magazine, Believe the Unbelievable and Receive the Impossible. You can find this publication at Jesse Duplantis Ministries. I hope you enjoyed my blog today! I look forward to blogging more often this year. I hope I don't let you down! May you have a blessed week my friends! Thanks for stopping by!

You Are More ~ BROKEN & RESTORED

Can we minister to others when our lives have been far from perfect? YES!

One of the greatest joys of my life is when I have the opportunity to share with others a story about my life's experiences B.C. (before Christ). My life has been far from perfect, and it still is. I'm a work in progress, as we all are. I still have my vices and imperfections, but my life has been drastically improved now that I know not to be so hard on myself, and to share my life's experiences with others who are still struggling through things I did. It's amazing to see God work through me. So today I want to share with you the devotional that hit home with me, and I hope it will bring light to someone's life today, as it did mine.
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Broken and Restored

by Drew Randle

One of my graduates from years ago, an active youth minister in a local church, called me up not too long ago with a probing issue. Facts had surfaced that his wife was having an affair. The couple had sought counseling to no avail. They were in the process of divorcing. His questions centered around his viability for continued ministry. Was he invalidated for ministry because of the divorce? With much grace, I assured him that he was not, but this would be a difficult road for him given the reality of church-related ministry.

My counsel to this former student and friend was centered around the fact that he could minister in a most unique way through his brokenness. His brokenness over his impending divorce and all of the emotions that went with it positioned him for unique ministry to broken people walking through divorce or similar situations. He was puzzled at first, but then saw some great ideas for potential ministry: a broken individual could be restored and minister God’s grace to someone struggling with brokenness.

Or imagine this: a man claims that he doesn’t even know his best friend and mentor. Categorically denies ever having contact with him. In essence, he denies that the mentor and friend ever existed. How must the mentor feel? Especially since he was present when his friend denied knowing him.

Fictitious story? Not at all. This is the story of Peter's denial of Jesus.

Peter, the brave and impetuous disciple who, in a fit of male bravado, had once claimed eternal loyalty to Jesus, now actually denied knowing Him. The Gospels record that when Jesus looked at Peter in that moment of denial that Peter was broken and shattered. This once bold disciple was reduced to fleeing the scene in disgrace.

Have you ever felt like Peter, useless after a betrayal or failure? Or have you felt like the student above, broken by the betrayal or disappointment caused by someone else?

Thankfully, the story of Peter doesn’t stop with his denial of Jesus. Later in the Gospels, we find that Jesus restored Peter three times for the three times that Peter denied Him. In fact, Jesus’ restoration of Peter extended to Peter’s ministry as a disciple. We read in Acts 2 that Peter preached a powerful sermon on the Day of Pentecost, filled by the Holy Spirit, where over 3,000 people came to know Jesus. Quite the ministry restoration. Peter ministered out of his brokenness.

How can we minister out of our brokenness?

First, we can remember that Jesus is in the business of using our broken lives to touch others. We read in Paul’s Letter to the Church at Corinth that we go through trials to help those going through trials themselves. We live that out by walking hand in hand with those who are suffering while we ourselves are in the midst of brokenness.

Second, Jesus displayed a long-term commitment to Peter’s restoration even in brokenness. We live in a sinful, fallen world. Brokenness takes time to heal. Are we committed to walking with broken coworkers or family members for the long haul? What are the limits to our care for others when we ourselves are broken?

Third, success in our work is a result of God’s graciousness and an act of His Spirit. Peter could take absolutely no credit for the people that came to know Christ at Pentecost. He was broken. This harkens back to the Apostle Paul’s claim that “His strength is made perfect through weakness.” People who don’t view themselves as broken or weak will rely on intellect, physical prowess, wealth, etc. instead of relying on the Spirit’s power.

Do YOUR part today to help another.

The GOLDEN rule..... Do unto others as you would have them do unto YOU.

Many people know this "rule" but few LIVE by it.

On my morning devotional today I was reading about a young mother who took her children to school and stopped by a convenience store, where a young man sitting outside mumbled something to her as she walked by. When she went inside, the holy spirit stirred within her and told her to buy an extra bagel and give it to him on the way out. So she did, and when she gave it to him he lit up like it was Christmas. Later on a woman in her friend's bible study showed her a picture of the boy, thanking her for offering her son a bite to eat during his distress. It was a while down the road before the young mother felt the impact her small random act of kindness did, but it was worth her effort.

How many of us see others around us hurting, but do NOTHING to reach out a hand?

When I was homeless there were several times that I was hungry and would have appreciated anything someone gave me. There were times I had to panhandle to eat, and many times I would just stand outside somewhere and ask someone to buy me food, not give me money. Now that I am not so destitute, if I see someone outside a restaurant who looks hungry, I will offer to buy or give them food.

Spring 2012:

My husband and I had just left our Celebrate Recovery meeting at church in Clovis, NM, and we decided to go to dinner together. After a late dinner we decided to stop at Wal-Mart for something I needed. I ran inside and my hubby waited in the car for me. When I went into the store I saw a young lady sitting beside the coke machines with the hood of her hoodie pulled up over her face. All I could see was her hair and her hands, which you could tell were swollen and bruised from a long day. She looked like she was sleeping. When I came out of the store and got into the car, something tugged at my heart. I knew it was the spirit saying "Amy, you were there once. What would JESUS do?". I told my husband to turn the car around. I went up to the girl and woke her. She wasn't very happy about it, and wouldn't even lift her head to speak to me. I asked her if she was okay and she told me to go away. Then I asked her if she was hungry. We still had warm pizza in the car from our dinner together. When I offered her food she asked, "Is it warm?" I told her it sure was! She lifted her head and smiled at me with a painful smile. I got the pizza out of the car and asked her if she had somewhere to stay for the night, offering her a ride to the local shelter. She declined any further assistance, but accepted the food gladly. I told her "I've been where you are, and I understand how you feel. I want you to know God loves you and He's watching over you." When we drove away it was the greatest feeling I'd had in a long time.

My friends, I ask that as you go through each day you will strive to love your fellow man as YOU would want others to love you. Imagine what an amazing world this would be if everyone sought to live by the Golden Rule! Remember these scriptures today....

I love the way the Message Bible puts this scripture.... Matthew 22:37-40:
Jesus said, "'Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.' This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: 'Love others as well as you love yourself.' These two commands are pegs; everything in God's Law and the Prophets hangs from them."

John 13:34: "Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other."

It is my prayer that we will each do our part to alleviate the suffering of another today and every day.