The Hurt & The Healer....My Version

It has been a very long time since I posted to my blog here, but I have a lot of spare time on my hands right now, so I am going to be improving my blog and even going to start working on a Facebook page to help uplift those who are struggling in life. I want to get better at living intentionally, so I am going to begin working harder at Passionately @live! So let me fill you in a little on how the past few months have played out for me.

The last post I put on here was back in February, and life starting taking a turn in March. March 6, 2015 I was off work and my husband and I decided to go to the library to check our messages. The very FIRST thing I saw was a post that my cousin, Michael, had passed away the day before from an apparent drug overdose. My world fell apart and I took it very hard. I was all the way in Montana & couldn't be home for his funeral, and that made me very sad.......ONE.....

Shortly after Michael passed I found out that my dearest Grandmother had to be rushed into emergency surgery. I got the call just after pulling out of the church parking lot on a Sunday morning. I was told that she may not survive the surgery, that doctors thought something had ruptured inside of her and they didn't know what. My grandma was 91 years old and her age definitely played a factor. I had about 30 seconds to tell my Grandma how much I loved her before they whisked her away to the operating room.

She survived the surgery and returned home about a week or so after, on hospice. I put in my 2 weeks notice at my job and prepared to return home to Arizona so I could hopefully see my Grandma one more time before she left this earth. I got home on April 24th, and had the fortunate opportunity to be there with her as she went to her heavenly home 3 days later......TWO...

While at my grandmother's viewing I was dealt another blow. I found out that my only remaining grandparent, my now 90 year old Grandpa Tom, was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and that he chose not to pursue any further treatment. He wants to live out the rest of his days with the best quality of life possible.

My grandpa is pictured, center, with his son and several of his nieces and a nephew, and their grandpa. Grandpa is still with us, but that news hit me so hard I couldn't breathe. I had to leave the funeral home and go have a good cry......THREE.

On May 9th, the day before Mother's Day, I found out that one of my best friends found her brother-in-law hung himself on his mother's porch. My girlfriend was beside herself with grief. Six days later, on the eve of her brother-in-law's memorial, two of my dearest friends in the whole world, who I'd been friends with for 25+ years, were nearly lost in a rollover accident just down the street from where I was living.......BOOM!

 THAT WAS IT.....

THE STRAW THAT BROKE THE CAMEL'S BACK......

After 11 years and 8 months of sobriety from my meth addiction I finally broke, and chose to get high to deal with the overwhelming grief that consumed me. My bestie on the right in the above picture was critically injured, with a crushed/shattered pelvis, several broken bones and internal bleeding. My bestie on the left was left paralyzed from the shoulders down, and we are hoping that she will regain use of her arms, but her future was crushed. Both of these girls are amazing friends and mothers. Their families' lives forever change by a freak accident that could have happened to anyone.

I returned to my addiction for nearly a month before realizing that my life was headed back down a very dark road, whose end was not a happy one. My loved ones could tell that I was spiraling out of control, and about 3 weeks into using again I chose to leave my hometown and everyone I loved behind and seek out somewhere that I could make a new life. I drove to Northern California to live with some friends who offered to help me put my life back together.

Less than 2 weeks into living with them, I realized that the living arrangement was not going to work out. I chose to leave my friends, and for the following week & a half I lived in my truck and laid my head wherever I could. During that time I was homeless...sleeping in the back of my truck, and robbed of everything of value that I possessed....while I was sleeping!!! It took me several days to contact my family and make arrangements to stay with cousins in Southern California, where I am living happily today.  But the trials don't end there....

I arrived in the San Bernardino area on July 3rd. By July 6th, an injury that I had sustained on my left big toe before I left Arizona became infected. The injury was around 2 months old and little healing had been sustained. I decided to go to the emergency room and was admitted to the hospital with an obvious infection. I was diagnosed with Osteomyelitis, infection of the bone, and required amputation. The doctors thought they might have to take half my foot, but I was given a blessing with anointed oil for the healing of the sick, and my foot drained out so much yucky, smelly discharge that by the time I had to go to the operating room, only my big toe needed to be amputated.

I have endured 15 days in the hospital over the past month and a half, two surgeries and I am still confined to a wheelchair with a wound vac on my foot to help encourage healing. Turns out I got some pretty serious bacteria in my foot while swimming & bathing in the rivers of Northern California. While I was in the hospital I decided to go back to church & get my life together. I am a work in progress, and trying to make every day better than the last.

I stopped using drugs on June 5th, and stopped smoking cigarettes cold turkey on July 6th, when I spent 10 days in the hospital. Once released, I disposed of 2 full packs of cigarettes, determined to stop partaking of unhealthy habits. I have a new lease on life because I realize just how close I was to losing my future for good. I don't plan to EVER use drugs or smoke ever again! I am looking forward to a great future once my foot is healed. The following song is one that rings true in my life at this time.

I want everyone to be encouraged by my story. I hope that hearing just a few of my recent experiences will help you to get through some of your struggles. KNOW THIS, friends...that God is REAL and he knows what you're going through. If you just turn to Him for your strength and healing, you can never go wrong and He will help give you strength. "For I can do ALL THINGS through CHRIST, who strengthens me. And He WILL strengthen YOU, too!!!!

Jan. 9 - My Thoughts on Ezra

How might this book in the Bible apply to my life? As I read the scriptures, I try to apply them to my life.

Sometimes God puts desires in our hearts for things we'd like to do, just as the people in Ezra's time desired to rebuild the temple, but things don't always go as planned. Everything we try to do gets put on hold or we run into road blocks left & right. We often don't understand why things aren't going the way we want them to. We start questioning if God had truly put the desire on our hearts to begin with.

In my life I believe this applies to my desire to start an outreach worship ministry. For a long time, God has put a desire in my heart to begin a band that will sing Christian contemporary music. It seems like the desire has been placed in my heart, but finding the right musicians & singers to join me has been difficult.

Does this mean that it'll never happen? No. It just means that it's not time yet.

So whatever the Lord has put upon your heart to do for His glory, keep your vision focused on what he wants you to do and watch for his signs to see when His time has come for you to do it. Don't lose faith.

Just as the people finally finished the temple, we will be able to fulfill all that the Lord has planned for our lives. Keep your faith strong, and keep on keeping on!

Where My Bible Opened to Today....Acts Chapter Two through Four

One of my goals for this year is to spend more time in the Word. I've begun to just open my Bible to wherever the page lands and I feel drawn to read. Today I've decided to start a little excerpt on my blog about Where My Bible Opened to today.

Acts 2 - 4

Having grown up in a religion where tongues were not spoken, the first time that I encountered the speaking of tongues in a spirit filled church I kinda freaked out. I thought to myself "Who are these people and why do they seem possessed?" I now understand, being filled with the spirit of tongues myself, I understand that the Spirit of God has ways of our prayers being led by HIS guidance. We just have to allow ourselves to be filled with the Spirit. I now allow myself to be taken into prayer in the spirit. I have no idea what I'm saying, but I know what I'm praying, and it's like a wave is washing over me. My head tingles and my heart is filled. It is by these feelings that I know that God is leading my prayers in a way HE wants to. As I pour out my feelings in prayer and let HIM guide my desires This has been but a small way that my testimony has grown since being led to a spirit filled church.

Acts Chapter 3

I have been the recipient of tremendous healing by the spirit of the Lord. I function now at about 85-90% most of the time, but chronic pain and physical problems have plagued me for years. I have not been COMPLETELY healed, probably so I'd remember to call upon my Savior for help. Most of the time when we are completely healed we forget to remember the source of our healing. I am actually grateful for the moments that I NEED HIM, because sadly, my human nature is the same as yours. If I didn't have any pain I probably wouldn't need to lean on Him as much as I do.

I have the desire to heal people with the amazing power of the Spirit. How amazing would it be to speak His name & watch the lame leap and the tongue speak. I guess you cannot believe it is possible unless you've been healed yourself. And I have!!! But I am still learning now how to speak the Word of God BOLDLY! It is my desire to teach others how to harness the power of the Spirit, but for now I am still learning myself.

I've recently had dreams of running into a particular friend of mine who has lost his way. He was once a true believer and follower of Christ, with such an amazing testimony. But through years of drug abuse, this amazing man has become possessed by a very demonic spirit that has managed to separate my friend from EVERYONE who knows and LOVES him. He's convinced himself of some very amazing things, including the thought that his life is like "The Truman Show" with Jim Carrey. He is convinced that people are being paid and made rich by watching his every move and profiting from his misery. It's so sad. Recently I have dreamt that I've run into him and laid hands upon him, and have had the POWER OF THE SPIRIT enough to DELIVER him. What joy would fill my heart if I could bring my dear friend back to his TRUE self....a believer full of strength & power in the Spirit.

I'm truly overwhelmed by the amazing power that God has given us IN JESUS' NAME. We can do ALL THINGS through CHRIST who STRENGTHENS us.

Starting the New Year off right....Hello 2015!

This year, I am proud to say, my husband & I started off in the right place. It wasn't in a bar full of crazy people, although we did go out and enjoy a couple free games of pool earlier in the evening. We went out for a quick stop on UM campus to check out the Butterfly House exhibit, which was pretty cool. But then we went to church, where we spent the evening playing board games, eating good munchies & desserts, and then we ended the evening with praise & worship, intercessory & prophetic word prayer time & communion at midnight.

What a great way to start a new year! It was so fun. One of the cool things that our pastor had us do was write down a prayer list for 2015, write our names on the envelope, date it, and place it in the offering plate/basket. Next New Year's Eve we will receive our envelope back (if we are present), so that we can see how much our prayers were answered during the coming year. One of the associate pastors got his back from 3 years ago this year, and he reviewed with us how God had answered almost every one of his prayers in some way, although some of them took him more than a year to accomplish.

So I thought I would use my first post of the new year to share with you what my prayer list is for 2015.

1.) My first prayer was that 2015 would bring me back to school. I have figured out ways that I can complete my education, and hopefully will be able to make that dream a reality later this year.

2.) Just like most people, I have a goal to become more healthy this year. Except my goal doesn't just involve losing weight. My goal is all about BECOMING A HEALTHY PERSON! I hope to become more dedicated at exercising, particularly with Yoga, Tai Chi, Zumba & aquatic exercise. I also want to become more learned about herbs & supplements that can help me feel better naturally. I believe that God gave us whole, natural foods to eat in order to stay healthy. 

3.) My dream has always been to have my own praise & worship band someday that will perform as a type of outreach ministry. I'm loving being a part of our Sunday worship team, and also helping with worship for Celebrate Recovery every Friday night. Tonight I led worship by myself, singing over the top of a CD, because everyone in our praise team was sick! I thought it went well. It brought back memories of Highland Baptist CR in Clovis. I really love singing, and I'm hoping to be able to increase my music & keyboard skills so that I can be able to play keyboards & read a lead sheet. That way my goal of putting together a music ministry may someday become a reality.

4.) My biggest dream is still to become a mother someday. I'm hoping that the Lord will see fit to grant me my heart's biggest desire this year, and bless me with the gift of motherhood. There could be no greater miracle for our lives.

5.) This month marks 4 years that since my husband & I met...on my birthday. This year (October 1st) we will celebrate our 4th wedding anniversary. My final prayer for this year was that Mark & I will continue to grow closer to each other & closer to God in all that we do. I'm looking forward to seeing what the Lord has in store!

May everyone have a blessed & happy 2015. I know I hope to!

New Year's Commitments

As 2014 is drawing to a close, I find myself doing what a lot of us do...planning for a new year. The past several years I haven't done ANY resolutions, feeling like "What's the point? I never keep them anyway!". Well, this year I've decided to change all that. I need an attitude adjustment, and recently I've been experiencing one. I find myself beginning to make goals again, and for this year, I need to devise a system to keep me on track. I just need to become more focused. Much of the time, my health conditions and chronic pain issues keep me held back. I try to set goals, but keeping myself on task is difficult when I can't sleep right, eat right or exercise like I should. 

This is what my human nature says... 

But this is reality...

Just because I have a bad track record of following through with things doesn't mean that I should just give up altogether! Lately, the changes that have occurred in my life have begun to stir a desire within my heart to set goals for the new year. Of course, I have the standard "resolutions" on my list...

• Eat Healthier
• Exercise More
• Focus on my education....keep learning something new every day
• Strive to achieve more in my career.... Etc.

I've already begun making changes that I will continue in the coming year. Just this month, I was able to FINALLY stop smoking! Tobacco addiction has ruled my life consistently since I was 13 years old. One of my first acts of rebellion, and it has tried to rule my life for nearly 24 years now. Well I finally have broken the habit. They say it takes 21 days to make or break a habit, and December 28th was 21 days since my last cigarette, so I've accomplished that goal already! And I plan to continue! Not only will I be able to breathe better, but it will improve my everyday life and singing voice quality.

The goals I have set for the coming year are ones that I hope to be able to continue every day for the REST of my life. These are areas that I have struggled with for years! Day by day, God is showing me the path that HE wants me to take in life, and that is to help others. 

I've always been a very free spirit, and very connected to others and their energy. I've also always had a lot of health issues. Well, I'm finally beginning to see that God has given me the ability to HELP others too. I am beginning to make changes in my life that will enable me to begin a system of changes for the future. I have an amazing career in hospitality, and I am beginning to read and learn more about the gifts & talents that God has given me to better myself & potentially help others in the future.

So my "commitments" for 2015 have to do with Body, Soul & Spirit.

Body:

• Eat more whole, natural foods
• Do Yoga daily to stretch my painful muscles
• Learn how to ease my pain through Acupressure, Massage & Essential Oils
• Sleep more regularly & with improved quality
• Supplement with herbs & natural healing remedies
• Help heal others with what I've learned & applied to myself

Soul:

• Strive to make connections to other women with common goals - establish positive friendships
• Strive to connect with other couples through couples ministry
• Seek out time to fellowship through bible study or ministry areas
• Begin seeking directions for areas of leadership both spiritually & in my career
• Seek to establish a healing connection between body, mind & spirit

Spirit:

• Spend time daily with the Lord in prayer & personal bible study
• Establish a bible study group with other couples
• Seek to be more active in women's ministry groups
• Actively participate in praise & worship ministry

Finally this is my ultimate prayer....

• Understand that the only person I can fix is ME
• Pray for others, but don't try to "fix" them
• Become more understanding of my differences with others, and APPRECIATE our differences
• Learn to practice Grace, Mercy & Forgiveness in all my relationships with others, and toward MYSELF

I pray that 2015 is a year that we ALL can stop focusing so much on the day to day and learn to see the bigger picture. I hope that we can all begin to see where God is challenging us to change and grow for His purpose is greater than we will ever know. Friends, I pray that you will have a desire to make "commitments" for the coming year that are realistic and that you will keep. I pray that MY commitments are ones that I will finally focus on keeping. May everyone be safe and blessed in the coming year. 

All My Love, 

Update.....Sorry it's been so long!

Oh my goodness! I can't believe that I've been so forgetful to post to my blog for so long! So much has been going on in my life. We returned to Globe, Arizona, my hometown, on June 1st, 2013. So much has happened since then. I began a new job on June 6th and haven't had any internet at home, so I've just forgotten about posting on here for so long.

NOW THINGS ARE BEGINNING TO HAPPEN!

God is showing me more and more what it is HE wants me to do! I am still in the planning/goal-setting stages, but Heavenly Father has been giving me visions of what He wants me to do with my future.

I am currently in the process of working with the Head Pastor of the church we currently attend in Globe, Arizona....Living Waters Community Church....in preparation to launch Globe-Miami's FIRST Celebrate Recovery program! Hopefully our program will launch after the first of the year, 2014. This is a project I am assisting with, and hoping to be involved as a leader at. However, it is not where I will stay. I'm sure we will serve there for 6 months to a year, but our ultimate goal is to finish our education so that we can embark on completing the visions that God has given each of us.

WE PLAN TO GET INTO MINISTRY!

God takes everything in our lives and turns it around for good. (Romans 8:38)
As many of you know, I spent years living a life of drug addiction, homelessness, spiritually broken and in the depths of hell due to my own choices. I realize that much of what I went through was due to the choices I made for myself, but a lot of those choices were because I didn't know how to deal with the issues that I had within.

So God has given me a vision to get a degree in Christian Counseling. I plan to minor in Praise & Worship pastoring. My husband spent 9 years in prison (literally) due to a bad choice that he made. God has given him a heart for prison ministry and he hopes to be able to develop a jail/prison ministry and also get a degree in Sound Engineering. We together have a vision to develop our own Christian non-profit organization that will be geared toward the healing of souls through various ministry efforts. We are also hoping to form a Christian Contemporary band to work within our organization, which will allow us to praise and worship Him through music, and share the message of Jesus Christ through the talents God gave us!

So now we are in a season of preparation. As the holidays are upon us, we are working toward forming our goals for the coming year. We are working on getting back into school in January, to continue working toward our long-term goals.

I have embarked on an online journey, and am currently seeking certifications through Christian Leaders Institute online, which will help prepare me toward my education in ministry. I will be using this blog as a communication tool for my education, and I WILL be posting more often! I hope you will check back to see what I've posted! Thanks for following!

Brother Jesse Duplantis Visits Faith Christian Family Church, First Service 1/27/2013

Once a year for about the past decade Reverend Jesse Duplantis from New Orleans, Louisiana has visited my church, Faith Christian Family Church in Clovis, New Mexico. Today I personally had my second chance to see this wonderful man of God speak. I will post two blog posts on this today, summarizing his sermons, because I believe it is worthy of repeating and sharing with others.

Jesse's first sermon today was about WHY ISN'T MY GIVING WORKING? The Four Types of Giving. All my life I have struggled with the Law of Tithing. I've always had questions about the tithe, first fruits and all the other ways of giving I've read about in the Scriptures. Today, all of those questions were answered and it all made sense to me. Starting next payday I plan to correct my ways of giving to line up with these biblical principles.

The Four Ways of Giving are:
1. The Tithe - Your 10% that which belongs to the Lord
2. First Fruits - Our first increase of the year
3. Alms - Compassionate giving
4. Seed - Investing and watching the Lord return your investment 30/60/100-fold

Number One - The Tithe
The Law of Tithing is outlined in Malachi 3:8-12. It is the only area where God ASKS us to put HIM to the test. He promises us that if we give 10% of our income to him faithfully, then he will open the windows of Heaven and pour out blessings so great to us that we have not room enough to receive it. He guarantees that HE will rebuke the devourer for OUR sake, but if we do not tithe he cannot rebuke Satan on our behalf. Those of us who do not pay tithing the way that we are commanded to cannot wonder why we can't make ends meet. (I am definitely included in this category of people. Sadly, I often make the excuse that I cannot afford to pay tithing, since my medical bills are so expensive out-of-pocket.) But all we need to do is OBEY, and watch God work miracles on our behalf. The blessing is already there. Are we motivated enough to OBEY Him so that He can keep his promise to us? God ALWAYS keeps His promises. The only reason WE are not able to claim those promises is because we don't keep the law that He has asked of us.  Many people say, "You don't have to pay your 10% to the Church, you can use that 10% to donate to another worthy cause and it is still considered a tithe." WRONG. Many people make this mistake and then wonder why the windows of Heaven are not open to them. This type of giving is motivated by OBEDIENCE. God commanded us to give our tithe to the Church, so that the Church can further its ministries, and then we in turn will be blessed with food in our storehouses, and protection from times of recession and depression.

Number Two - First Fruits
The Scriptures says in Proverbs 3:9-10 to "Honor the Lord with thy substance, and with the first fruits of all of thine increase, so shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and thy presses burst forth with new wine." The way Brother Jesse explained the first fruits giving is that it is done once a year, with our first increase of the year. Back when the Scriptures were written, the economy was mainly agricultural, and people measured their first increase by the first fruits of their harvesting season. Therefore, they would take those first fruits and donate them to the Church or the Priest, and then the remainder of the harvest was theirs to do with as they would. This type of giving is motivated by GENEROSITY. It is a way of HONORING what the Lord has given to us. He promises us that our barns will be full and our vats will overflow with new wine, which, put plainly means that we will always have MORE than enough food in our storehouses. We will never go hungry. I have never done a first fruits offering, as I have never truly understood this. However, I am anticipating a raise in the near future, and I plan to give the first fruits of my increase (a whole $17.50) to the Church, and give it to an area of ministry. I will probably donate it to Celebrate Recovery, since that is an area of ministry I am actively involved in, or maybe Missions. Someday I hope to go on a humanitarian mission with my husband, to Latin America, where I can bless the lives of less fortunate people in cultures that I have a passion for.

Number Three - Alms
"Alms for the poor!" - We all know that saying. This is exactly what type of giving this is. This type of giving is motivated by COMPASSION. It is giving to the less fortunate, and in doing so, giving anonymously. In the Word it says, "Let not thy left hand know what thy right hand is doing". This type of giving is to BLESS the lives of others, and to do so without bragging. We should never brag about how much or to whom this type of giving is done. This is to preserve the dignity of those we give to, and just to show that we care about others, not for our own gain. The Lord promises us that the gifts we give in alms giving will be repaid back to us dollar for dollar, that we shall not PROFIT from this type of giving, but that how much we give to others, as long as we do it humbly, will come back to us in kind. This is the only type of giving that does not promise an increase, but equal favor for the favor we show to others.

Number Four - Seed
When we plant a seed, we wait for the crop to grow and reap ABUNDANCE in the harvest. This is exactly how Brother Jesse explained this type of giving. This type of giving is motivated by FAITH & REWARD. What this means is that when we plant a seed in fertile soil (or INVEST in a good and worthy cause), we will receive back 30, 60 or 100-fold what we sow, depending on our faith, and how much we believe in that reward. This is the most abundant blessing we receive back to us, and it blesses not only ourselves but future generations. Those who do not sow seed will not reap the abundance that is promised. So donate to a worthy ministry or invest in a worthy investment and watch your seed grow and enjoy the abundance that comes back to you according to your faith.

This month's Covenant Magazine, a monthly publication by Jesse Duplantis Ministries, outlines in detail the first two types of giving, and next month's edition will detail the last two. This was a lot of typing for this post, so I will blog about what he preached during our second service today another time. It was just as powerful and wonderful. If you don't want to wait for me to post about it though, just read the title article in this month's Covenant Magazine, Believe the Unbelievable and Receive the Impossible. You can find this publication at Jesse Duplantis Ministries. I hope you enjoyed my blog today! I look forward to blogging more often this year. I hope I don't let you down! May you have a blessed week my friends! Thanks for stopping by!

Lord, I love the way you hold me!!!

Psalm 73:23 (AMP)

Nevertheless I am continually with You; You do hold my right hand.

 

Hello friends! I know it's been a few days since I last posted, but life has been happening so fast around me! My wonderful husband and I have been rolling with the punches that this crazy world has been dealing us, and I haven't been around the computer much in several days.

 

So today I wanted to give praise to the Lord first and foremost...that by praising Him through the storms of my life, He gives me added strength to face every day, push through the pain I live with daily and get through every day productively. He gives me the ability to enjoy the blessing of His Word..."But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired. Isaiah 40:31AMP".

 

I rejoice in every day, and I dance around when I hear this song! Remember friends....Jesus rejoices with us when we continually praise him through EACH DAY of our lives, no matter what trials may come our way. I pray daily for all my dear family and friends, that you may all be blessed with all that the Lord has planned for your life! (Jeremiah 29:11)

 

 

You Are More ~ BROKEN & RESTORED

Can we minister to others when our lives have been far from perfect? YES!

One of the greatest joys of my life is when I have the opportunity to share with others a story about my life's experiences B.C. (before Christ). My life has been far from perfect, and it still is. I'm a work in progress, as we all are. I still have my vices and imperfections, but my life has been drastically improved now that I know not to be so hard on myself, and to share my life's experiences with others who are still struggling through things I did. It's amazing to see God work through me. So today I want to share with you the devotional that hit home with me, and I hope it will bring light to someone's life today, as it did mine.
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Broken and Restored

by Drew Randle

One of my graduates from years ago, an active youth minister in a local church, called me up not too long ago with a probing issue. Facts had surfaced that his wife was having an affair. The couple had sought counseling to no avail. They were in the process of divorcing. His questions centered around his viability for continued ministry. Was he invalidated for ministry because of the divorce? With much grace, I assured him that he was not, but this would be a difficult road for him given the reality of church-related ministry.

My counsel to this former student and friend was centered around the fact that he could minister in a most unique way through his brokenness. His brokenness over his impending divorce and all of the emotions that went with it positioned him for unique ministry to broken people walking through divorce or similar situations. He was puzzled at first, but then saw some great ideas for potential ministry: a broken individual could be restored and minister God’s grace to someone struggling with brokenness.

Or imagine this: a man claims that he doesn’t even know his best friend and mentor. Categorically denies ever having contact with him. In essence, he denies that the mentor and friend ever existed. How must the mentor feel? Especially since he was present when his friend denied knowing him.

Fictitious story? Not at all. This is the story of Peter's denial of Jesus.

Peter, the brave and impetuous disciple who, in a fit of male bravado, had once claimed eternal loyalty to Jesus, now actually denied knowing Him. The Gospels record that when Jesus looked at Peter in that moment of denial that Peter was broken and shattered. This once bold disciple was reduced to fleeing the scene in disgrace.

Have you ever felt like Peter, useless after a betrayal or failure? Or have you felt like the student above, broken by the betrayal or disappointment caused by someone else?

Thankfully, the story of Peter doesn’t stop with his denial of Jesus. Later in the Gospels, we find that Jesus restored Peter three times for the three times that Peter denied Him. In fact, Jesus’ restoration of Peter extended to Peter’s ministry as a disciple. We read in Acts 2 that Peter preached a powerful sermon on the Day of Pentecost, filled by the Holy Spirit, where over 3,000 people came to know Jesus. Quite the ministry restoration. Peter ministered out of his brokenness.

How can we minister out of our brokenness?

First, we can remember that Jesus is in the business of using our broken lives to touch others. We read in Paul’s Letter to the Church at Corinth that we go through trials to help those going through trials themselves. We live that out by walking hand in hand with those who are suffering while we ourselves are in the midst of brokenness.

Second, Jesus displayed a long-term commitment to Peter’s restoration even in brokenness. We live in a sinful, fallen world. Brokenness takes time to heal. Are we committed to walking with broken coworkers or family members for the long haul? What are the limits to our care for others when we ourselves are broken?

Third, success in our work is a result of God’s graciousness and an act of His Spirit. Peter could take absolutely no credit for the people that came to know Christ at Pentecost. He was broken. This harkens back to the Apostle Paul’s claim that “His strength is made perfect through weakness.” People who don’t view themselves as broken or weak will rely on intellect, physical prowess, wealth, etc. instead of relying on the Spirit’s power.

Do YOUR part today to help another.

The GOLDEN rule..... Do unto others as you would have them do unto YOU.

Many people know this "rule" but few LIVE by it.

On my morning devotional today I was reading about a young mother who took her children to school and stopped by a convenience store, where a young man sitting outside mumbled something to her as she walked by. When she went inside, the holy spirit stirred within her and told her to buy an extra bagel and give it to him on the way out. So she did, and when she gave it to him he lit up like it was Christmas. Later on a woman in her friend's bible study showed her a picture of the boy, thanking her for offering her son a bite to eat during his distress. It was a while down the road before the young mother felt the impact her small random act of kindness did, but it was worth her effort.

How many of us see others around us hurting, but do NOTHING to reach out a hand?

When I was homeless there were several times that I was hungry and would have appreciated anything someone gave me. There were times I had to panhandle to eat, and many times I would just stand outside somewhere and ask someone to buy me food, not give me money. Now that I am not so destitute, if I see someone outside a restaurant who looks hungry, I will offer to buy or give them food.

Spring 2012:

My husband and I had just left our Celebrate Recovery meeting at church in Clovis, NM, and we decided to go to dinner together. After a late dinner we decided to stop at Wal-Mart for something I needed. I ran inside and my hubby waited in the car for me. When I went into the store I saw a young lady sitting beside the coke machines with the hood of her hoodie pulled up over her face. All I could see was her hair and her hands, which you could tell were swollen and bruised from a long day. She looked like she was sleeping. When I came out of the store and got into the car, something tugged at my heart. I knew it was the spirit saying "Amy, you were there once. What would JESUS do?". I told my husband to turn the car around. I went up to the girl and woke her. She wasn't very happy about it, and wouldn't even lift her head to speak to me. I asked her if she was okay and she told me to go away. Then I asked her if she was hungry. We still had warm pizza in the car from our dinner together. When I offered her food she asked, "Is it warm?" I told her it sure was! She lifted her head and smiled at me with a painful smile. I got the pizza out of the car and asked her if she had somewhere to stay for the night, offering her a ride to the local shelter. She declined any further assistance, but accepted the food gladly. I told her "I've been where you are, and I understand how you feel. I want you to know God loves you and He's watching over you." When we drove away it was the greatest feeling I'd had in a long time.

My friends, I ask that as you go through each day you will strive to love your fellow man as YOU would want others to love you. Imagine what an amazing world this would be if everyone sought to live by the Golden Rule! Remember these scriptures today....

I love the way the Message Bible puts this scripture.... Matthew 22:37-40:
Jesus said, "'Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.' This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: 'Love others as well as you love yourself.' These two commands are pegs; everything in God's Law and the Prophets hangs from them."

John 13:34: "Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other."

It is my prayer that we will each do our part to alleviate the suffering of another today and every day.